Does the person you love...
- Track all your time?
- Discourage other relationships?
- Humiliate you in front of others?
- Have extreme mood changes?
- Anger easily when using alcohol or drugs?
- Accuse you of being unfaithful?
Has the person you love ever...
- Struck or slapped you?
- Threatened you with an object or weapon?
- Given you visible injuries?
- Been violent towards your children or pets?
- Forced you to have sex against your will?
Your partner may offer, or may be advised, to seek the help of a therapist or counselor. We advise you make plans for your own protection, independent of any counseling he/she may receive. If you want to give him/her or the relationship another chance, we suggest you do so only after you see a lasting change in his/her behavior.
You should consider that:
- Abuse usually gets worse unless some action is taken to stop the violence
- It may take up to one year or more of committed work on the abuser's part to change his/her abusive behavior.
- Any treatment for drug or alcohol abuse should also include treatment for violent and abusive behavior and protection for the victim.
- Emotional and sexual abuse must also be dealt with in counseling for abusers.
- It is often best that partners live separately while the abuser works on his/her violent behavior.
- Consider the effect on your children of living with violence in your home. They may also need counseling.
- There is no guarantee that counseling will stop the abuse.